Thursday, February 23, 2012

Dreams, The Ones You Have While Sleeping

The stars of my dream.
Along with this guy. WTF?

















I think I have some pretty fucked dreams. Ever since I can remember, like since I was little, I’ve always had dreams of being chased by something. I’ve been chased by killer clowns, monsters, people, the aliens from Aliens, ect… I could go on for a fucking week. My dreams are pretty vivid too. I can taste, touch, and feel things, even pain. Lately I’ve been having crazy TV dreams. Like I have the TV on and I fall asleep to whatever is on. I’ve solved cases with Grissom and Brass from CSI regular, had a gun fight with Stella from CSI New York, busted a hooker with the black chick cop from Southland, tried to get into the pants of Starbuck, Apollo, and Helo from Battlestar Galactica, but the fracking Cylons kept attacking. That would’ve been one epic ménage cuatro. Fracking Cylons always ruining everyone’s fun. 

I could have had all three. :(

The other day I took a nap on the couch while Burn Notice was on and had a full on Burn Notice dream, but without Jesse. I didn’t even miss him. It starts in a movie theater and ends in one. I’m at the movies with me and Michael Westen’s kid. Yup we had a girl. Too bad I didn’t remember the conception. He and Fiona weren’t together anymore. Boo hoo. Some dude tries to kidnap our kid, who I just call baby. He fails, but the whole team shows up, Michael, Fiona, Sam, even Michael’s mom. The kidnapper gets the drop on us and kidnaps me, Michael and our kid. The kidnapper is none other than C. Thomas Howell in his Southland police uniform. In my dream he’s this bat shit crazy former spy who’s obsessed with Michael. He holds me and the kid hostage and forces Michael to go on this insane crime spree. C. Thomas is killing kids, kidnapping Dalmatians, robbing Dairy Queen, and all sorts of retarded things. C. Thomas is ridiculously nuts, singing, laughing at nothing, humping his car. You just had to be there. So we all somehow end up back at the movie theater where there is a big gun fight between Michael, Sam, and C. Thomas. Bam C. Thomas is dead. Michael has to wire $100,000 to the Russians to come clean up the mess. Then there’s a twist. Sam and his new girlfriend betray Michael and give him 24 hours to pay them $100,000 or they’re going to turn him into the FBI for his crimes. I wake up. You have to agree that is some weird ass business. Now I’ve never tried to have a TV dream on purpose, but I think next time I’m going to put on Farscape and hopefully have a 3 way with John Crichton and Aeryn Sun. I let you all know how it goes. Peace out homies. 


Hoping to be in the middle of a John and Aeryn sandwich  real soon.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Bitches Be Trippin. What's New?

Would you pay $162 for this polish? Yes? Then you're fuckin stupid!

Just when I think I’ve seen it all I get slapped upside my head and reminded that I most certainly have no. I have recently entered the world of nail polish and nail art. I’ve read some nail blogs to get ideas and learned a thing or two. One of those thing is bitches go bat shit crazy over nail polish like you would not fucking believe. Seriously you won’t believe it. I learned the existence of an online shop called LLarowe http://www.shop.llarowe.com/. They sell some fabulous, you don’t see every day, nail polish. I like them on my Facebook page and monitor them for sales and what not. They sell a brand called Lynnderella. I must admit Lynnderella has some fabulous shit, but it’s always sold the fuck out, but that’s no biggie since they shit is $15 a pop. I get queasy paying more then $8 for polish. I hop on to LLarowe to see if they will have any sales coming up. What the fuck do I find? Bitches going psy-fucking-chotic over this Lynnderella shit. Sure as shit the nail blogs I follow are talking about it too. There are actual hate groups devoted to hating LLarowe for not selling more Lynnderella. Lynnderella is a one woman show. Lynn makes and bottles the polish all by herself so it’s not super plentiful. That’s the way it goes twats, get the fuck over it, go to the store and by something else. Don’t start hate groups over the shit. Hate groups for fuck’s sake what the fuck is wrong with you people? I heard rumors that Lynnderella was going for ridiculous amounts of money. Out of curiosity I check it out. Sure as shit the stuff is selling anywhere $18 to $162.60. $162? Don’t believe me? Look here http://www.ebay.com/itm/New-Lynnderella-CONNECT-DOTS-Black-White-Glitter-VHTF-Nail-Polish-/110825183020?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item19cdb2172c#ht_585wt_905. Are you bitches retarded? You can’t think of anything better to spend your money on 1 bottle of nail polish. While you dumb cunts are pissing your dough away why not sling some my way? Or help some poor homeless or starving kid you stupid whore? I’m a pretty shallow bitch, but not that shallow. I do give cash to the homeless and starving so suck a dick bitches. Anyway here’s a little tutorial for all you bat shit crazy whores to make your own fabulous polish so you don’t have to send hate mail to people or spend stupid amounts of money on it.

 1.       First decide if you want to make a bottle of the shit or just enough for one use.
         2.       If it’s more than 1 procure some small glass bottles with tops and a decent artist’s brush.
         3.       Go to Walgreens, Walmart, or where the fuck ever and get a pallet of eye shadow to tint your polish if desired, a few bottles of clear NOT fast dry top coat, pure acetone remover (for cleaning up your shit), and paper cups to mix your shit.
         4.       Go to Jo-Ann’s or better yet Michael’s. Go to the Martha Steward section coz that bitch has some first class glitter and pick out the colors and shaped of the glitter you want. They also have some nifty ass non Martha glitter in the scrapbook section.
         5.       Go the fuck home.  Pour a little or all of one of the top coats into a cup. Use a dry artist’s brush to brush some eye shadow into polish until you get the desired tint. Dump in a little or a lot of various glitters. Mix that shit with something. Paint your stupid nail and pour it into a bottle to save for later.
         6.       Clean up after yourself twat. Nobody wants to see your mess.

       Yes it sounds like a bit of an ordeal, but look on the bright side, you don’t have to go all nuts when you can’t get Lynnderella, you’ll save a shit load of dough, and you can make whatever fucking color chokes your chicken. So that’s the end of tonight rant. If one of you crazy bitches somehow stumble across this I’m so very, very, very sorry…you’re bat shit crazy. Grow up; get a life, or whatever. You annoy me. There I feel better now and that’s all that counts.

Friday, February 10, 2012

Does This Shit EVER Frackin End?






Apparently it sure the fuck does not. So I took Miss. Kitty to her doctor for her check up. Everything seemed to be right as rain. She’s growing like a weed. She grew another ¼ inch in a month. She is a little on the too skinny side but she eats like a P I G hog every day. She’s pretty healthy. So just when I think it’s gonna be a good fucking day for once I get my ground knock right the fuck out from beneath me. The doctor has me come stand behind Kitty to show me how her right shoulder blade is significantly higher than the left. I stand in front of my girl and see how when she stands straight her right should is higher than the other. This has all happened in the span of 16 months, the time since her last real physical. How in the fuck did I NOT notice this? It’s not some little thing, some little misalignment, it is very obvious. Her doctor tells us she needs to get an x-ray and my poor little love immediately bursts into tears because she’s afraid of what is going to happen to her. Just when I think my heart can’t break anymore it does. This is why I don’t believe in God. How the fuck can I? The cards have been stacked against her since she was conceived. I gave one of the world’s shittiest fathers. She was born at 29 weeks, had a collapsed lung, and some shitty as fuck nurses. Not all were shitty, thank who the fuck ever, but it’s the shitty ones I remember the most. She’s got ADHA, learning troubles, and now a messed up back. What the fuck?! What the hell did she ever do to deserve this? Hasn’t my life been such a spectacular fail that hers should be good?  I don’t get it. She sees an orthopedic specialist on March 19.

Afterwards we went to the mall to get her shoes to go with her new dress. She wanted white heels and that’s what she got. She wanted a heart necklace and feather earrings and got those too. All during the trip she kept asking questions and looking scared. She told my parents as soon as we walked in the door so now my dad will be driving himself bat shit crazy worrying about her to the point of being obsessed. He’s a good dad and great grandpoo, but I swear he loves to make himself sick worrying. I can’t stand that shit. I have enough to deal with worrying about her and comforting her. I shouldn’t have to worry about babying him too. I’m so fucking tired of being the man, the strong one. It always has to be me.

That’s enough of my boohoo poor me rant for today. Tonight I will take a small fist full of Xanax and hopefully sleep for once. Kitty has dance class and her last basketball game of the season. I’m hoping she makes a couple baskets. Oh and to add insult to fucking injury neither my broadband nor the internet and data have been working right for the past 2 days. 3g speed my mother fucking fat ass. I’m paying a $100 a month for this shit so you’d think it would work right? WRONG. One more day of this shit and I’ll be ready to choke a fuckin bitch out. Fuck me!

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Shop Until Your Panties Drop

The Spring Concert Dress. Oohh lala!

Before my weekend spontaneously combusted I had a very wonderful day at Mayfair mall with my Kitty, Aunty Kikki, and little Shoosh. We went to get Kitty a new dress for her spring concert. It’s not as short as it seems. It wasn’t my first pick, but it was what she liked and Aunty Kiki didn’t think it was too short. It is springy looking. Friday we go for shoes. She wants high heels of course. This weekend I’m going to make jewelry to match the dress. She will look fabulous! Shoosh wanted a few dresses for her little self. Unfortunately they were all Kitty’s size. I think she just liked touching the fabric. 

Our first stop though was to the little Lush shop inside Macy's. Sweet Mother, that place is mag-fucking-nificent. It smells soooooo flippin good I can barely deal. Part of this haul was for me and Kitty and the rest is for a friend. My fav is the blue soap Kitty actually picked out for Grandpoo. I believe it's called Ice. It smells minty fresh. It was Ice or some soap that smelled like a basket of berries and I didn't think Grandpoo would be diggin that. 
   

Our last stop was the most magical store on Earth, Sephora. One of these days I need to go there alone, with no kids, so I can slowly molest every single item of beauty that I can get my paws on. I looked over the nail polishes first, but nothing really caught my eye. I sauntered over to the perfume section and couldn't resist Coach Poppy. I have been lusting after it for over a year. Kitty also happens to love it. How many 10 year olds do you know that go to school wearing Coach, Chanel, and Gucci fragrances? You all know one now. Fuck I didn't have half the shit this kid has now. My mom didn't have the shit I have now to share. It's insane how different her life from mine. Yeah, yeah, material things aren't everything but they sure as fuck make life easier and more fun.

No panties actually dropped during this shopping trip, but I think a diaper or two did. Time for me to piss off until next time. I gotta catch up on my stories. First Grimm and then The River. 

Friday, February 3, 2012

To Sell or Not To Sell



I have a shop on Etsy called Queen Cassie’s Jewels. It’s been a few years since I’ve sold anything there. Not because my jewels suck, but because I haven’t listed anything. Above are two of the pieces I’ve recently created. I think they’re pretty. When I did list I was pretty successful. So what’s my fucking problem? Why do I keep buying materials, creating jewelry, but don’t list anything? I’ll be fucked if I know. I’m not sure if I’m afraid of being a failure or a success. Maybe I’m just a lazy ass bitch. I don’t know. It is a lot more work then it seems. The picture taking and editing takes the most time and I’m a shitty ass photographer and I don’t have the cash to pay someone to do it for me. I either need to start selling my creations or sell the supplies. I need to take it slow and maybe list 2 or 3 items a day or every other day. All in all I think I've given more away then I’ve ever sold. Pretty fucktarded hey?







Above are my older creations. They all sold. Punk Tinkerbell and the green Day of the Dead girl sold multiple times. I also want to get back into making soap and bath bombs, but I can't really justify buying supplies for that if I'm just gonna make things and not sell the. I used to sell soap and bath bombs on Ebay. Again I was successful and again I just quit. Epic fail right? So I will be taking baby steps so I don't freak myself out again. Wish me luck.


Sleep Is For Suckers




The Books
“Another sleepless night I can’t explain. Somebody said they heard me call your name…” Why the fuck do I have to have this song stuck in my brain at 2 frackin 30 in the morning? Since I’m being tortured so shall the world or anyone unlucky enough to come across this blog right meow. It really is another sleepless night for me. IDK what my problem is in the sleep department. I’ve always been this way. I usually can’t fall asleep before 2 or 3 am, but lately I’ve been pulling up all nighters. I’ve been going back to bed for a few hours after I take the horde to school. I try not to fight it too often. Sometimes though, I need to fucking sleep. What do I do into the wee hours of the night you ask? I do a lot of reading, movie watching, writing, jewelry making, and pinning shit to my boards on Pintrest. This is my books shelf. It stuffed, books stacked in double rows. There are about 30; I shit you not, more on my bed’s head board/shelf. . I usually read more than one book at a time. Right now I’m reading:



A Clash of Kings is the second book from the Game of Thrones series. I am absolutely captivated by both the books and tv show. I am enthralled by Queen Daenerys. I sometimes skip around to her chapters. I won’t say anything else in case someone hasn’t read it yet. People get all pissy and bent outa shape over spoilers. 


The second is the last book in Eragon series. I’ve had a little more trouble getting into this one. I think it’s because there has been so many years between Inheritance and the book that came before it. My eyes are finally getting droopy so I’m gonna try and get some sleep. Buenas Noches!


Thursday, February 2, 2012

Nails and Kitty Cat Tales



I got my nail polish today!!! I did a happy dance like a fucking dumb ass. My dad looked at me like was retarded, but I didn’t care. It doesn't take much to make me happy these days. So after I took my horde of children to the art museum coz it was free and to IHOP for din din I did my nails. I painted them the bright range with the orange and pink flecks. It looks very summer like. I dried faster than I thought it would. I think I’m in loooooove. Baahahahaha. Next will be the one named Anja and the orange and pink flecks.  And if I’m brave enough I’ll try water marbling.

So yups after a long as day of watchin a baby I rounded up my girl Kitty and her 2 friends Baby Buttercup and Snowflake and hauled them all to the art museum for some culture. No these kids were not raised in a hippy commune those are their nicknames. It was quick visit because art doesn’t hold the attention of a 6 year old and two 10 year olds for long, but they enjoyed themselves. They did, however, have much more fun stuffing bacon and pancakes into their little mouths at the IHOP. Then again who wouldn’t enjoy that? Tomorrow I have my best baby girl Shoo Shoo Baby or Shoosh for short. Again it’s her nickname. She’s my bff’s baby. She’s 1 and a half and pretty much the only reason lately that I don’t go back to bed after I take my horde of children to school. I’ve been on the depressed side lately. I’m getting over it. Shoosh is the funniest, sweetest, baby ever after my own. She loves to give me tisses (kisses) and loves her Tashy. Tashy is what she calls Kitty. When Tashy is home Shoosh don’t want nobody but her. It’s very sweet and wonderful. Shoosh also loves nanas, cookies, and long walkie walkies around my house. Grandpoo, who she just calls Poo, supplies her with cookies. She makes me almost want another baby. Almost. LOL 

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Things and Stuff

How I want my nails to look.
So, this is my first blog post on my very first blog. I don’t really know why I’m doing a blog. I guess I just need somewhere to bitch, whine, and occasionally moan about life, share the things I love and rip apart the people I hate. Maybe people will follow me, but probably they won’t. I’m a nobody and that’s ok with me. I get on these kicks where I get obsessed with things. Lately it’s been nail polish and nail art. The picture is not of my nails. They are not fit to photograph right now. I ordered a bunch of Zoya nail polish and they are due to arrive tomorrow so I’m waiting to redo my nails. IDK why nails and polish appeal to me so much right now. Maybe it’s because some days I feel like I’m wrapped in grey ugliness. Yup I’ve been a bit of a downer lately. With a few swipes of a little brush I can add some color to my world. Plus manicures have become special bonding time for me and my daughter Kitty.  She’s learning to pain her own nails and she likes to do my toe nails. She thinks they need polish coz I hate doing my toes. I also bought a bunch of nail stamping plates. They’re pretty fun, as long as you remember to take off the clear protective sheet.  It’s damn near invisible. I thought I was doing it wrong until out of frustration I scratched it and part of it came off. DUH! The picture of the Zoya polishes is the set I bought along with three others. I’ve seen how these look on some other blogs and they are stunning. When I put them on I’ll take a picture. In total I spent almost $60. That’s the most I’ve ever spent on nail polish at any one time. I also got a free sugar scrub and polish remover. No too fucking bad. That’s all for now. Maybe I’ll blog about something more substantial tomorrow. Maybe not. It’s my world so I’ll blog about whatever the fuck I want.


Zoya Fleck Effect $24